Top 10 Underpublicized Reasons to Seek Couples Counseling

“All marriages require work, but when one or both partners start to feel emotionally disengaged the marriage becomes highly vulnerable to further deterioration without outside help. Marriage Counseling can be helpful in a variety of situations, large and small. Married life isn’t always easy. After the rush and excitement from the wedding and honeymoon fade away, reality sets in. Marriage counseling is nothing to be ashamed of or to fear. Anything that can get you and your spouse back on track is a good thing. Whether you have large or small issues, marriage counseling can help you work through them  together.”

The Top Ten Underpublicized Reasons to Seek Couples Counseling

Do you notice everyone around you is in couples counseling? I do, because I’m a couples therapist. But even among people I meet casually, it seems everyone is going. The stigma of seeing a couples therapist will probably reverse soon.

So, why be left out of this trend? All around you, couples are improving their marriages, and you’re stuck in an uncommunicative, non-intimate, frustrating relationship that makes you feel bad five days out of seven.

“But,” you say, “I have only threatened divorce a handful of times, only under stress, or when we are fighting, which is only often and not constantly, and half of the threats are in my own head. We still have sex at least a couple times a month, and I like my partner at least half the time. Well, a third. What percentage is a fifth again?”

“Surely others,” you continue, “who are truly bad off, are the ones who need couples counseling. My spouse just needs to figure out how not to be such a jerk, and then we will be fine.”

To this series of defenses mixed with white lies and outright denial, I rejoinder, snappily: “If your leg was infected, would you wait for gangrene to set in before seeking medical attention? Do you think marriages improve as you get farther and farther away from the honeymoon period and have more stressors, some which crawl and destroy your home, to contend with?”

Read more: http://psychcentral.com/blog/archives/2014/08/15/top-10-underpublicized-reasons-to-seek-couples-counseling/

Teenager – Adolescent Development & Parenting Tips

“When you consider that the teen years are a period of intense growth, not only physically but emotionally and intellectually, it’s understandable that it’s a time of confusion and upheaval for many families. Becoming a young adult is exciting, difficult, and scary for both parents and teens. It is a time of increasing independence and change, no matter what the situation. Learning to be independent does not happen overnight. Just like getting a driver’s license, it occurs over time and in steps.”

http-::dev.mainelyseo.com:cdi:ages-stages:teenager-adolescent-development-parenting

There is no doubt that for most families, the teen years present a challenge for both parents and children.

Middle School is not fondly remembered by most who attend.  It is often fraught with scary body changes, bullying by peers and a new surge for independence.  This leads to passive-aggressive behavior (“I’ll do it in a minute”), self-consciousness (“What are you staring at?”) and self-doubt (“I’m not good at anything.”) and/or over-confidence (“Well, I thought I could do that.”) and of course moodiness (“Leave me alone.”).

High School is usually better for most.  It is a time to really begin defining ones self and realistically contemplating the future.  Skill development is accelerated to prepare for college or job training programs.  Talents are perfected.  Social skills are honed and relationships take on more of a serious nature.  Peer pressure is at its max and in today’s teen society there are more tempting sidetracks than ever.

During adolescence, kids need their parents more than ever.  Research shows that a positive family environment including fun family activities, open parent-child communication and the encouragement to participate in positive extracurricular and community activities, teens are able to navigate these years with relative ease…

Read more: http://childdevelopmentinfo.com/ages-stages/teenager-adolescent-development-parenting/

Five Things We Can Do to Reduce Domestic Violence

“Domestic Violence is not a topic that is comfortably talked about in the open, however, it is a problem that affects this whole country. The intervention of neighbours and the wider community is one of the keys to stopping the violence. Domestic violence can be defined as a pattern of behavior in any relationship that is used to gain or maintain power and control over an intimate partner.   Abuse is emotional, verbal, sexual, financial, stalking, physical or psychological actions or threats of actions that influence another person.  This includes any behaviors that frighten, intimidate, terrorize, manipulate, hurt, humiliate, blame, injure or wound someone.”

The video of Ray Rice striking his (then) fiancée Janay Palmer, while the two were riding in a hotel elevator, has started a national conversation about domestic violence. But how will that conversation end? Will it somehow lead to less domestic violence in the future—or, barring that, more help for its victims?

It could. As it happens, last week marked the twentieth anniversary of the Violence Against Women Act. The law poured billions of dollars into law enforcement, helping authorities to identify incidents of abuse, prosecute offenders, and help victims. It also raised awareness of the problem, at a time when a national news event—the killing of Nicole Brown Simpson, estranged wife of running back O.J. Simpson—was having the same effect.

Two decades later, incidents of reported domestic violence have fallen by more 70 percent, according to the best available evidence. You don’t have to believe VAWA and greater awareness are the primary explanation to believe they had a powerful effect. “That’s a monumental change from twenty years ago,” Vice President Joe Biden, the architect of VAWA, wrote this week in Time. “But we know there’s more to do.”

 He’s right. One in four women say they have been victims of domestic violence, according to studies. Even though that number will fall over time, because of the recent progress, that’s still a whole lot of people—not just millions, but tens of millions. And precisely because VAWA has made so much progress, getting the numbers down farther may be even harder.